Entries Tagged 'humour' ↓

Dictionary of Non Words

These are all words which didn’t quite make it into the Oxford English dictionary.

  • I love a Nonversation. I think I will probably end up Dunandunating on that.
  • Not sure how my mother would respond to being called a Vidiot
  • I hope this all doesn’t cause – Xenolexica
  • At least by publishing this  I will no longer be a Stealth-geek. I will be openly displaying by sadness and getting joy from words like pregreening. I’d like to know the word for cyclist who completely ignores red lights.
  • I reckon Wurfing will inevitably get into the dictionary at some stage, I mean it’s what everyone does!

DICTIONARY OF NON WORDS;

  • Accordionated – being able to drive and refold a road map at the same time
  • Asphinxiation – being sick to death of unanswerable puzzles or riddles
  • Blogish – a variety of English that uses a large number of initialisms, frequently used on blogs
  • Dringle – the watermark left on wood caused by a glass of liquid.
  • Dunandunate – the overuse of a word or phrase that has recently been added to your own vocabulary
  • Earworm – a catchy tune that frequently gets stuck in your head
  • Espacular – something especially spectacular
  • Freegan – someone who rejects consumerism, usually by eating discarded food
  • Fumb – your large toe
  • Furgle – to feel in a pocket or bag for a small object such as a coin or key
  • Glocalization – running a business according to both local and global considerations
  • Griefer – someone who spends their online time harassing others
  • Headset jockey – a telephone call centre worker
  • Lexpionage – the sleuthing of words and phrases
  • Locavor – a person who tries to eat only locally grown or produced food
  • Museum head – feeling mentally exhausted and no longer able to take in information; Usually following a trip to a museum
  • Nonversation – a worthless conversation, wherein nothing is explained or otherwise Elaborated upon
  • Nudenda – an unhidden agenda
  • Oninate – to overwhelm with post-dining breath
  • Optotoxical – a look that could kill, normally from a parent or spouse
  • Parrotise – a haven for exotic birds especially green ones
  • Peppier – a waiter whose sole job is to offer diners ground pepper, usually from a large pepper mill
  • Percuperate – to prepare for the possibility of being ill
  • Pharming – the practice of creating a dummy website for phishing data
  • Polkadodge – the dance that occurs when two people attempt to pass each other but move in the same direction
  • Pregreening – to creep forwards while waiting for a red light to change
  • Quackmire – the muddy edges of a duck pond
  • Scrax – the waxy coating that is scratched off an instant lottery ticket
  • Smushables – items that must be pack at the top of a bag to avoid being squashed
  • Spatulate – removing cake mixture from the side of a bowl with a spatula
  • Sprog – to go faster then a jog but slower then a sprint
  • Sprummer – when summer and spring time can’t decide which is to come first, usually hot one day then cold the next
  • Stealth-geek – someone who hides their nerdy interests while maintaining a normal outward appearance
  • Vidiot – someone who is inept at the act of programming video recording equipment
  • Whinese – a term for the language spoken by children on lengthy trips
  • Wibble – the trembling of the lower lip just shy of actually crying
  • Wurfing – the act of surfing the Internet while at work
  • Wikism – a piece of information that claims to be true but is wildly inaccurate
  • Xenolexica – a grave confusion when faced with unusual words

Cliff’s Squeaky Shoes from Cheers

Rising Damp – Food Glorious Food

One of my favourite episodes from classic BBC sitcom

Some Mothers Do Have Em – Funny Clips

The famous rollerskating incident

“I haven’t got any change “

“Betty, I’ve been articulated”

Dog in Car

Operating Theatre

Yorkshire Humour

yorkshire
Yorkshire Dales Country – It’s not all coal mines and cotton mills….

I like this news flash from Yorkshire – Gods Own Country

* Explosion in pie factory injures 3.1416 people
* Some suffered fractures of the radius…
* ..but most employees are squared serious injury

However, when I read their post about Yorkshire Independence I realised they might just be exercising a bit of that Yorkshire wit.

For more Yorkshire humour

Try:

Monty Python’s Four Yorkshiremans sketch

Yorkshire Airlines video

Only Fools and Horses – Chandeliers

Del Boy’s plan to renovate some priceless chandeliers.

Best of Tommy Cooper

Some of the greatest clips by comedy genius. Tommy Cooper

Rachmaninov Had Big Hands Video

How to play Rachmaninov with some wooden bricks

Sir Marcus Browning Audio

We are facing the gravest economic crisis since 1380?

We have many questions to ask ourselves?

From Live in Belfast

Video of Big Train Small Train

“If the trains are going to be bigger and the country is bigger – won’t we need a giant to push the train?”